UGA Jobs That Pay The Same

In my never ending quest to analyze UGA's byzantine salary system, I've discovered many unrelated jobs are in the same pay scale. In other words, the position of fry cook may have the same minimum and maximum salary as a mechanic. Or journalism professor. No, wait -- this excludes faculty positions. So, what are some of the fun jobs that have the same pay range? Glad you asked. I only take two or three jobs in each category. Many have 10 or more listed in a particular pay range.

• herdskeeper II, snack bar supervisor, and TV programming specialist are all listed as "pay range 45" with an annual minimum of $22,750 and an annual maximum of $43,831. Herdskeeper. Neat.

• A fire extinguisher inspector, a video editor, and (I am not making this up) "post conviction relief assistant II" are all at range #47, from $22,750 to $46,051.

• A welder, a lab animal health technician, and a sheetmetal worker are all #53 ($25,383 to $54,977).

• My favorite: "first mate" is #68, along with business manager II and parking operations manager and police corporal and, of course, others. Range is $36,760 to $79,620. First mate? Ahoy, skipper.

• A police sergeant, a project architect, and a TV news director are all #74, ranging from $42,629 to $92,334. I should insert some snark here about TV news directors. Insert your own.

• At the very tip top end of the scale, at range #123, there's only one job -- "senior associate CIO & Technology Officer" with a range from $85,000 to $195,500. My guess is, only one person is exactly that. And UGA being UGA, I wonder if it's not near the top of that scale.

What does this mean in the greater scheme of things? That I need to get the hell out of the office on a Friday afternoon, that's what. Or at least walk away from the spreadsheet.